Rizz goes round the world

The Bottom Bus and the rest of New Zealand (Dunedin, Curio Bay, Te Anau, Milford Sound, Queenstown, Christchurch, NZ)

5 October - 15 October

Ok, this is getting a bit tedious, and there's so much more to write, so I'm just going to try to get through the rest of New Zealand. It's just such a shame, as I've experienced so much I want to share with you, but perhaps some stories will have to wait until when I get home, if I ever get home...

At any rate, after lack of sleep and late nights dancing in Queenstown, Joey and I decided to travel together down to the southernmost part of the South Island, on an extension of the Kiwi Experience called the Bottom Bus. Joey and I had really clicked; if I had grown up in England I'm sure she would have been my Julie. It's just so incredible and amazing to by chance meet people that you would have never met otherwise but who go on to become one of your closest friends. But, I digress.

After another late night, we boarded the much smaller Bottom Bus at 8 AM. It was me, Joey, Jon, who'd been with us previously, a guy named Steve who ended up being quite the character, and then a group of 4 young guys who so badly wanted to be in a boy band and who were really up on themselves and stand-offish. After the amazing experiences we'd had with our old crew, Joey and I were a bit disappointed with the new company, but tried to make the best of it. When we arrived in Dunedin and walked around a bit, we decided it might be best to stick around for a few days, and catch the next bus to Curio Bay, instead of just leaving with this bus the next morning. Dunedin was much bigger than we had anticipated, and much more interesting. We also could use some rest after the insanity of Queenstown. So I pushed my flight back a bit and we booked the next Bottom Bus. That would leave Monday, and, as it was Thursday, that gave us plenty of time to rest our bones and souls.

That night the whole crew from the Bottom Bus took a haunted walk through Dunedin. Dundedin is an old city, in terms of New Zealand cities, and, as it was modelled after Edinburgh, Scotland, it has a bit of that eerie Old World, Jack the Ripper type feel to it. The walk was quite honestly not scary, although a stroll through a graveyard in the dark can creep anyone out a bit. Joey and I ended up falling over into a tree after someone jumped out at us in the darkness. I so knew it was coming, but it still took us off guard, and over we both fell. At least we didn't scream. The boys did. After the walk, we all went back to a pub for a free beer. Joey and I were exhausted, and I hadn't showered in a while, so we returned to the hostel and hung out with Alex, from Oz, and Dave, from Ireland, 2 guys staying with us whom we'd met that afternoon. They had also come from Queenstown. We showed each other photos of bungees and sky dives, and then Joey fell asleep on Alex's shoulder and drooled a bit. :) Another lovely thing about travelling and meeting people: a rushed platonic intimacy means the people you meet don't mind when you drool on them, even after only having known them for a few hours.

The next day we took a tour of the Cadbury Chocolate Factory. Pure bliss as it entailed lots of free chocolate. The tour was led by a young guy dressed in purple overalls. Our very own Oompa Woompa. Later that night we hung out with a guy named Scott, from Texas, who we'd met in the bookstore the afternoon before. It was a lovely evening of drinks and excellent conversation about travel, politics, the US, the world, life. Have I mentioned how much I love travelling?

The next day, Joey and I literally did NOTHING. Alex and Dave made fun of us as we wrote in our journals, slept and read on the couch all day. Feeling a bit unaccomplished, we decided to try out a cafe mentioned in my Lonely Planet. Dunedin has some absolutely amazing cafes, and most are vegetarian! We carried on updating our journals, curled up on a couch in the corner, then read a bit about the Fringe Festival, which was coming to an end. Both of us having a background in dance, Joey and I decided to check out a piece called In the City, a dance performance meant to symbolize life in New Zealand in terms of the dichotomies of urban and rural, and Maori and European. Yeah. The dancers walked around the stage for about 15 minutes. Then a guy with a very distracting beer belly moved his hand and asked "What's this worth?" Then everyone laid on their backs with their hands and feet in the air and wiggled around a bit. I was just waiting for one of them to fart. Joey and I walked out and immediately burst into laughter. I hate pretentious pieces of art that feign to represent something deep when they're really just dumb.

Afterwards we met Alex and Dave for a bit of a night out. We made our way to a discotech where we sat upstairs and watched people dance on the lower level through the glass wall. It was quite amusing people-watching in a disco. The DJ was also amusing. His turn tables were all set up in front of him. He didn't have us fooled though. All the music was simply selected on the computer. He was essentially a man standing in front of a juke box all night. Very self important though, and dressed entirely in black, he'd pose with his hand on his hip, switch sides, watch his flock with a smirk on his face, switch sides again, sashay, chante, etc... He'd also intermittently put on his head phones and toy a bit with the turntables, although no record could be seen within the vicinity. We of course had our picture taken with him. He was a legend, though not in the way he intended.

We left the disco at 1 AM, but somehow managed to extend a 5 minute walk back to the hostel into 2 hours. It involved a bit of wrestling on sidewalks, walking without purpose, then taking an hour to find something to eat at the 24-hour store. When we finally got back to the hostel, the hummus we had bought ended up tasting like ass, so Joey and Alex would decide a better use of it would be to smear it in each other's faces, and a hummus fight of epic proportions commenced.

The next morning Joey and I had planned to rent a car out to a local peninsula for some time with wildlife. We didn't get up until 11 however. Oops. All we managed was a very worthwhile stop in the Botanic Gardens, considered the best in New Zealand, and a tour of Speight's Brewery. We got to taste test a bit aterwards. My favorite was the chocolate beer. Yum.

Finally, Monday had arrived and it was time to hop back onto the Bottom Bus. Our new driver, Bloke, fit his name well. In his 50s, but very weathered, Bloke, with his piercing blue eyes, could have been Nick Nolte's father, rolled his own cigarettes, and was full of stories from his childhood in the south. He was truly a Southern Man. That day, we made a few stops on the way to Curio Bay to peep some seals, sea lions, and penguins. The sea lions were incredible. Three laid asleep on the beach, and we stood within 10 feet of them. They'd prop themselves up intermittently, look at us quizzically, yawn, showing their bright red mouths, and then lay back down. By the time we got out to see the penguins, though, it was absolutely frigid, and the skies were pelting down rain and hail. We didn't get to fully appreciate the beach of ancient petrified forest upon which we stood and the penguins in the distance, but no matter. That night we curled up next to the fire as the wind howled wildly and the hail smacked against the roof.

The next day we stopped briefly in Invercargill and then pushed on to Te Anau. Te Anau, a small scenic town surrounded by a lake and mountains (the youngest brother to Queenstown and Wanaka) was quaint, and Joey and I enjoyed a stroll around before meeting up for a few beers with Bloke and the others. That night we had an epic movie night at the hostel-- Legally Blonde (Yay Boston!), Me, Myself & Irene (Yay Rhode Island!!!!!!!!!!!) and The Sixth Sense. Only Joey, Steve and I lasted past Legally Blonde. Steve was progressively drinking himself into a stupor, as he was apt to do, as Joey and I chowed on Cadbury and Tim Tams. Then Oliver came in. Oliver was a French guy who we'd met earlier when he was looking for jumper cables for his car. Let me pause a moment and explain the TV room. Someone had hand-built it to be tiered, and it was a cross between a movie theater and a church. On the ground level was a normal couch and 2 chairs. Then someone had built a wooden tiered platform with 2 built-in benches. Joey and Steve were on the ground level. I was laying across the first tiered bench. When Oliver came in, he sat on the upper bench. The last thing I knew I could hear Oliver behind me laughing as we watched Me Myself & Irene. Then not even 5 minutes later there was a loud thud as Oliver somehow managed to roll off the bench and fall to the hollow wooden floor. I covered my face with my duvet as I shook with laughter (I can't help it. I always laugh when people fall.) There was about 2 minutes of silence. Then Oliver got up and walked out, and I burst into hysterical laughter. I couldn't even talk. I don't know why it was so funny. Maybe because there was no reaction out of Oliver? Maybe because he'd clearly been awake 5 minutes prior? Maybe because of Joey's reaction of, "Wow, that's really high. I hope he didn't hurt himself." All I know is that Joey and I, for the rest of our trip through NZ, would each commence into a fit of giggles, and the other one would always know, "Oliver?"

The next morning, we said goodbye to Bloke and boarded another bus out to Milford Sound. The drive was spectacular: snow-covered mountains threatening to release an avalanche, winding roads, a pitch-black tunnel through the center of a mountain, reflective, tranquil lakes. In the Sound itself, we took a cruise. It was pretty drizzly and overcast that day, as it tends to be in the area. The vista was eerie and ethereally beautiful, but not as stunning as I had anticipated. I think next time I make it out this way, I'll actually go to Doubtful Sound instead.

After Milford, it was back to Queenie. Here we go again. Joey and I had a few more nights of dancing until dawn. It's nice to know I still have it in me. We also became groupies to a local cover band called Afterglow (meaning we followed them around and had drinks with them...not groupies in the biblical sense!!!) which was fun. We felt very cool and important for a while as they showered us with attention and brought us around with them after their gig. Until they realized we were not the true groupie type and ditched us for Britney Spears in her trashy stage and Jessica Rabbit, with the teeth but minus the boobs. Oh well.

On Saturday we headed up to Christchurch. I made my final journey as Ditte Jensen. :( In Christchurch we bumped into Dave, our friend from Dunedin, and then later met up with Naomi and Daragh, a couple from England who'd been with us earlier until Franz Josef. We checked out a band at a bar called Dux D Lux. They didn't compare to our Afterglow boys. The next day we checked out the city a bit and walked around, then Joey came with me on the shuttle to the airport. It was time to say goodbye to New Zealand and to my new close friend. It was sad saying goodbye, but I knew Cheryl, Adam, and Lance awaited me in Sydney, so that helped. When we hugged our goodbyes, Joey told me to think of her as the plane sped up to take off--her favorite part of the flight. I did just that, and as the plane raced down the runway, I looked out the window. One last New Zealand rainbow appeared in the sky to bid me a final farewell. Goodbye New Zealand. I promise to return, but now it's on to the next chapter.

posted by La Rizz @ 7:08 PM